Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
