ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
How does it feel to date your dad?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
