You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize
