he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
