you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize