As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
