I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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