We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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