But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
