My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
