Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
