This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
