When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Randomize
