she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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