We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
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