Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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