they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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