So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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