The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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