Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
