dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
