According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
