You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
