some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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