he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
