Taylor Swift is so right about you.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
