I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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