Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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