I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
