He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize