He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize