dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
