NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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