Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
