one might say we're banned from that church
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
