you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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