I want to walk on stilts...naked
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I am naked and annoyed.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
