I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
