Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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