I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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