happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i think i have herpe
just one?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
