Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize