grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
it's great music for shaving your balls
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
