Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize