So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
