and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
