She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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