Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
