nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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