I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
foreskin is a definite game changer
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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