we have officially lost it.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
